{"id":1119,"date":"2019-11-28T12:29:25","date_gmt":"2019-11-28T10:29:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/xpand.eu\/sa\/?p=1119"},"modified":"2019-11-28T12:29:25","modified_gmt":"2019-11-28T10:29:25","slug":"appreciation-shifts-people","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/xpand.one\/sa\/appreciation-shifts-people\/","title":{"rendered":"Appreciation Shifts People!"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div><\/div><\/div>

Appreciation Shifts People!<\/h2>\n

\u2018Appreciation is an aesthetic act, in which something is observed, seen and\u00a0<\/i><\/span>made visible, praised, celebrated and sung. It is (being) loved from the dark\u00a0<\/i>to the light.\u2019<\/i> \u2013 D<\/span>orothee <\/span>S<\/span>\u00f6lle<\/span><\/p>\n

When I turned sixty a few years ago, I thought it was – not surprisingly <\/span>\u2013<\/span> a<\/span> good <\/span>time to celebrate those sixty years with a healthy dose of gratitude.<\/span> I invited my best friends of all ages. Friends from my student<\/span> days, friends from our time in Germany, friends from our climbing<\/span> club, friends<\/span> from our village, friends from <\/span>our company (Xpand)<\/span> and of course our families. We celebrated the party in the new climbing<\/span> hall (Block013) of our sons Robin and Jeroen, who started<\/span> their own company a year earlier with a lot of courage, heart and<\/span> common sense. There were over a hundred friends. What wealth!<\/span> What beautiful people!<\/span> Everyone had written a card with the<\/span>things they appreciated about me. After the party on Saturday, I<\/span> spent my Sunday reading all those cards carefully. What a great gift<\/span> of appreciation they were!<\/span><\/p>\n

Fortunately, as a child, I had already learned the importance of appreciation<\/span> – and expressing it – something I have also tried very hard<\/span> to pass on to my own children. And, fortunately, this is now often<\/span> and gladly done within our family in the form of written cards, gifts,<\/span> encouragement or simply by \u2018being there for the other\u2019. For example;<\/span> when Robin, our youngest son, went to work for four months<\/span> on a farm in South Africa, in the bush, during a life-transforming<\/span> time for him – at the age of 19 – he wrote personal, long letters full<\/span> of appreciation for everyone in our family. When he came home,<\/span> and we were all sitting around the dining table, he handed us the<\/span>letters. We were all extremely touched and felt appreciated within<\/span> the core of our beings.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>

<\/span><\/div>

How does appreciation affect the recipient?<\/strong>
\nThe experience of appreciation causes a type of chain reaction in the \u2018receiver\u2019. The following example illustrates this:<\/p>\n

The ingenious inventor Thomas Alva Edison said he needed about 10,000 attempts before he managed to invent a working, incandescent electric light bulb. His comment, \u201cI haven\u2019t given up. In addition, I\u2019ve actually just discovered 10,000 new ways in which the light bulb doesn\u2019t work.\u201d Where did Edison\u2019s enormous perseverance come from?<\/p>\n

I have my own theory about that. When Thomas was only nine years old and had made his first invention, a story that Edison told later in life, his father had praised him for it. For the next twenty years, Edison\u2019s father had always been \u2018observing\u2019 him during his experiments. His father always knew to find something to praise. In other words, young Edison grew up in a loving and appreciative environment. This foundation of appreciation helped Edison develop a healthy self-awareness. Despite the 10,000 failed attempts, he courageously managed to persevere and become a great inventor.<\/p>\n

A question for you:<\/strong>
\nHow many people in your environment can you help in their development and growth towards becoming healthy people by appreciating them? I see plenty of opportunities here for beautiful chain reactions through positive feedback and encouragement, so that recipients are (re-) inspired and feel appreciated. It is, of course, important to immediately realize that we are not talking about a once-off expression of appreciation. After all, even with normal everyday words, multiple repetitions are often necessary before the message \u2018arrives\u2019.<\/p>\n

Tips to Appreciate others:<\/strong>
\n1. Write a letter describing 3-5 specific attributes you appreciate about that person.
\n2. Each week appreciate one colleague for 2 actions they did that week.
\n3. Have an appreciation dinner with family and friends. Around the table give time for each person to appreciate another person at the table.<\/p>\n

\u2014\u2014\u2014<\/p>\n

This blog series is written by Paul Ch. Donders, author of his new book, Appreciation.<\/em><\/p>\n

Restoring the dignity in humanity<\/em><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Get your copy of the\u00a0Appreciation<\/i><\/b> Book for R170 today. During this festive season we would like to appreciate you by giving you the option of buying 10 copies or more for R120 (incl. vat) per copy. Courier costs not included. Contact us at 079 434 9030 or info-sa@xpand.eu<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>

In other words, appreciation means:<\/strong>
\n1. You listen to or look at a person attentively, to discover his\u00a0uniqueness and value.
\n2. You take the time to perceive the beauty of the other person.
\n3. You meet this person, and express what you appreciate about him\u00a0or her.
\n4. In this way, the other person experiences something of your\u00a0unconditional acceptance and it becomes a little easier for that person\u00a0to appreciate him\/herself.<\/p>\n

In Latin, we use the word \u2018benedicere\u2019, which means \u2018blessing\u2019. It is a\u00a0combination of two words: \u2018bene\u2019 = good and \u2018dicere\u2019 = speaking. In short, to\u00a0say good things about the other person. Bless the other. Something that we\u00a0see a lot in traditions. A child is blessed at baptism, newlyweds at their\u00a0wedding. Or, as you would say in Israel: Shalom! Which literally means,\u00a0\u2018Peace!\u2019 The deeper meaning behind the word is the desire for well-being and\u00a0a life in harmony with the other. Speaking of blessings!<\/p>\n

Appreciation also contributes to mental health. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Dr Viktor Frankl and Dr Alfred\u00a0Adler gave the following three conditions to stay healthy as a human being:<\/p>\n

1. Discovering your talents, developing them and using them for a\u00a0greater purpose.
\n2. To find and fill your unique place within the community, to feel at\u00a0home there and needed.
\n3. To make a unique contribution and thus be of significance to your\u00a0environment and the greater whole.<\/p>\n

In order to discover and develop your unique talents, you need spoken\u00a0appreciation, in the form of honest and constructive feedback. In order to find\u00a0and take your place in a community, you need appreciation, in the form of\u00a0affirmation – that you are wanted and needed there. To experience that you\u00a0are valuable to others, you need their appreciation. This gives you a valuable\u00a0confirmation of what your contribution and impact is on your neighbour and\u00a0your environment.<\/p>\n

Tips to start living a life of appreciation:<\/strong>
\n1. Take time every day to recognize 1 good talent yourself.
\n2. Take time regularly to affirm the contributions and skills of your family,\u00a0colleagues, spouse, friends and customers.<\/p>\n

\u2014\u2014\u2014<\/p>\n

This blog series is written by Paul Ch. Donders, author of his new book, Appreciation.<\/p>\n

Restoring the dignity in humanity<\/em><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Get your copy of the\u00a0Appreciation<\/i><\/b> Book for R170 today. During this festive season we would like to appreciate you by giving you the option of buying 10 copies or more for R120 (incl. vat) per copy. Courier costs not included. Contact us at 079 434 9030 or info-sa@xpand.eu<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>

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